Monday, March 26, 2012

7 Things in Relationships That Separate Men From Boys

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Regardless of how old you are, you can’t get to adulthood without experience. And even with our experience, some of us get stuck in adolescence, despite what we tell ourselves. We think we’re being grown, but we’re just being a kid. With that being the case, there are some things that separate men from boys. Today I want to share seven of the differences between men and boys when it comes to dating and relationships.


Men look for quality. Boys look for quantity.

Men are more concerned with the quality of their relationships than the frequency of their relations. I’m not impressed by men who rack up the notch count. Assuming we’re decent-looking, confident and can articulate ourselves, it’s easy to get laid. If you ask enough women to come home with you, eventually one will be there in the morning. The law of numbers doesn’t lie. If you try and try again, you’ll eventually win and fall into some gushy. But what is winning? What does it really mean? You’ll get different answers when you talk to a man and a boy.

It’s fine to not want to settle down. Timing is an important part of life. But the continued pursuit of bodies to keep a hold on your championship belt is worth no more than the dirt of the earth. Nobody will care about how many women you slept with in 10 years. Men understand this and switch their game up accordingly. They can go out on the weekend and not feel compelled to bring someone home just so they can tell their boys about it in the morning.

Men know when to call it quits. Boys know how to wait it out.

Part of being an adult is the ability to recognize a situation that’s counterproductive and take the steps to put yourself in the best long term position possible. Sometimes that involves making tough decisions that leave others hurt along the way. It’s part of life.

One of the most difficult things to do is tell someone you’re in a relationship with that you no longer want to be with them. One of the most cowardly things to do is stay in that relationship in hopes that you can get the other person to end it because you don’t have the courage or courtesy to do it first. Men have the difficult conversations. A boy avoids them and hopes that the woman will do what he should’ve done first. Even worse, boys disappear without saying anything at all. 

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