Wednesday, February 29, 2012

Love, Money, Sex and Other Complications

Batshit crazy

Today’s post is one of those rambling, all over the place messes where I try to tie a bunch of things together into one coherent theme. Lots of parentheses and tangents ahead. You’ve been warned.

The weather in NYC has been freakishly warm and I’ve been taking advantage of it. I’ve been forcing myself, no matter what else is going on, to get out and walk every day. Long walks through the city.

Not that it’s a burden. I love taking long walks, even in crappy weather. But sometimes I get busy…

Anyway, the other day I was out walking. Standing on a street corner I heard one woman say to another, in a loud and rather angry voice,

“He wouldn’t pay for my new shoes. Can you believe that?”

I didn’t hear the friend’s response. Or maybe it wasn’t her friend. Maybe it was a sister, or colleague. Whatever. I have no context. For the conversation or the situation. Maybe she was talking about her husband. Or a boyfriend. It just made me think (more) about the weird relationship(s) between men, women and .

It’s 2012 (hard to believe but true) and we’re still rehashing the same old issues related to this stuff. Men sometimes (frequently) have more money and power than women. Especially older men. And some women feel comfortable trading their youth and good looks for (expensive) stuff. Let’s assume that  and/or love are probably also part of the deal.  Which is what it is. I try not to judge.

Did you know that one of the fastest growing sectors of the online dating industry (at least according to recent news reports) are Sugar Daddy type sites? Wealthy men looking to spoil younger, attractive women. Again, trying not to judge. Just stating a fact.

I know men (acquaintances, not friends) who’ve bought women cars, computers, clothes… and these were women they were neither married to or living with. Because they loved them. Or maybe just liked having sex with them a lot. Either way, major cash was spent.

I don’t know. I don’t know how I feel about any of this. Well… that’s not true. I’ve already written in pretty great detail about how I feel about dating and paying for dates.  The short version: I’m not comfortable having guys pay all of the time. And so I can’t imagine letting a man shower me with super expensive gifts (small, very nice gifts are lovely). The idea that there are women (of any age) who’ve come to expect major gifts from the men they’re sleeping with is just kinda icky to me. And yet, instead of being a thing of the past, it seems to be as common as ever. In 2012.

It is what it is. I guess.

Love, Money, Sex and Other Complications


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