'Let me tell you about divorce …'

She was a wide-eyed romantic. He was a hard-bitten divorce lawyer. But, says Christina Hopkinson, their marriage has been the very definition of happinessChristina HopkinsonDespite their differences, Christina Hopkinson and her husband have been happy together for 11 years. Photograph: David Levene for the GuardianThe majority of people, having fallen in love and got engaged, talk about plans for the wedding day, not about the potential for divorce. Unless they've got Paul McCartney's money and marital history, they don't debate the merits of a prenuptial agreement or consider whether it's a good idea to seek legal advice before tying...

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The Secret to Emotional Intimacy

By Rori RayeDid you know you can skyrocket the connection you feel with a man simply by choosing different words when you speak to him? There comes a time – maybe shortly after you get to know a man, or maybe a little later – when you’ll want to tell him something that’s bothering you, and yet you feel afraid to tell him the truth for fear of messing things up or pushing him away. This happens to all of us. Even now, before I speak a hard "truth" to my husband, I feel that thrill of fear go through me – the "good girl" part of me that thinks I’m better off "keeping things to myself."And yet, what if the hardest things imaginable...

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Diary of a separation

Am I lazy or have I just become used to intimacy?I got a message from Mark, the aspiring sitcom writer this week. I have been really, really hopeless with Mark since dumping him by email after three dates. For a while he kept in what felt to me like oppressively close touch, emailing and texting and suggesting we go out for a drink. In return, I behaved like an evasive weasel, expressing generic positive thoughts about the "going out for a drink" scenario, then going silent or finding an excuse whenever he suggested a concrete date. Finally he got quite cross and asked if I really wanted to see him again and I said that he was putting too much...

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Tempted to Call the Ex? Stop, Drop and Roll!

By Maryanne ComarotoMy "Stop, Drop, and Roll" technique is the tried and true, all-time favorite method for avoiding relationship Groundhog Day (the insanity of doing the same thing over and over expecting a different result), which is what we do when we make impulsive, unconscious choices like calling an ex when we know better. Learning this skill is not only effective but, according to scientific studies, developing delayed gratification skills has been associated with success in all areas of life. It works just like a fire drill! Stop:True love does not have a shelf life, Real love will be here tomorrow, next week, and next...

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Life For Rent: Confessions Of A Mistress

By Ruth PurpleThe mistress, you can’t hate her enough. If you can skin and burn her alive, you know you would. You can’t help but be overwhelmed with anger.But stop, pause and ask yourself- is all that hatred and anger worth it? “When a wife gets into all kinds of trouble to get even, she is only acknowledging the mistress’ role. The mistress feels recognized, accepted. It’s kind of twisted when you think about it, but a mistress feels fulfilled in some way when a wife confronts her. The moment you face her, she feels triumphant…” says a Sandra, a former mistress. “Never exhaust your energy on the mistress you are only wasting it…” she continues.Sandra...

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